Quigley Down Under - 1990

Pathé Entertainment

Directed by Simon Wincer

Cast:

• Matthew Quigley – Tom Selleck
• Crazy Cora – Laura San Giacomo
• Elliot Marston – Alan Rickman
• Major Ashley-Pitt – Chris Haywood
• Grimmelman – Ron Haddrick
• O'Flynn – Ben Mendelsohn

Story: Elliot Marston has a problem. He advertises for the best long-range rifleman in the world to come to Australia and work for him. When Matthew Quigley arrives from Montana, his Sharps rifle in hand, Marston thinks his problem will be solved. That is, until Marston explains it isn't wild dogs he wants killed but aborigines. Quigley has just arrived after three months at sea, and is in no mood to be told he's been lied to. After a physical confrontation with Marston and his men, Quigley and Crazy Cora, a woman who was being taken to Marston's ranch as “company” for the men, are taken out from the ranch and left to die in the wilderness. Somehow, that doesn't work out, and now Marston has a much bigger problem: Quigley. After being found in the desert by the aborigines, who save their lives with water and tribal medicine, he defends them against a couple of assaults by Marston's men, and winds up with a bounty on his head. When he learns that Marston is offering the bounty, he lets him know in no uncertain terms he is not pleased.

Review: Granted this is not the old west, although it is set in Western Australia. Tom Selleck, in my opinion, was born a couple of decades late. It's too bad the romance with westerns has passed on, since Selleck could have easily been a contemporary of The Duke. His easy-going, “down home” style and charm work well in the western genre, and with the exception of Robert Duvall and Sam Elliot, I can't think of another star who fits the “cowboy” persona better. Well, maybe Eastwood. Laura San Giacomo works beautifully as the films female love interest and comedy relief, since neither Rickman or Selleck offer us much in that way. She gives us her story in brief episodes, the returns to the “Crazy Cora” persona long enough to convince us it isn't all an act. Or is it? Alan Rickman plays what he plays best, an arrogant ass with money and power who enjoys pulling the wings off butterflies when he isn't shooting down people for the fun of it. He uses money as his weapon, and indulges himself whenever possible. Since most of his men are conscripts from the local prison, Marston is of the belief he is untouchable. The aborigines have no lines in English, and are pretty much the window dressing of the film, although there are some interesting scenes where Selleck and the aborigines interact. Overall, the film has plenty of flaws and lapses, but they are easy to look past when you watch the action scenes. And neither Selleck for the ladies or San Giacomo for the gentlemen are that hard to look at. Rated PG-13 for violence and sexual innuendo, the teens in the house will have no problem with the plot and the adults will enjoy the various quibbles between the principles. Not sure if this is all that collectible, but I have a copy. Like I said, I like westerns, and I like Selleck.

Seraphim Falls - 2006

Icon Productions

Directed by David Van Ancken

Cast:

• Carver – Liam Neeson
• Gideon – Pierce Brosnan
• Hayes – Michael Wincott
• Railroad Foreman – Xander Berkeley
• Minister Abraham – Tom Noonan
• Parsons – Ed Lauter
• Henry – Kevin J. O'Connor
• Kid – John Robinson
• Madame Louise – Angelica Huston
• Rose – Angie Harmon
• Charon – Wes Studi

Story: It is three years after the end of the Civil War. Carver, a former Confederate officer, is on a manhunt. He is chasing Gideon, a former Union officer, the man he holds responsible for the death of his wife and family. His four hired guns are warned not to kill him, aim for his limbs only. But capturing Gideon proves a bit more complicated than it would appear. He is a highly resourceful man, able to live in the wild. Along the way, they encounter homesteaders, traders, robbers, and a railroad crew, and while several times it appears Gideon is at the end of his rope, he manages to escape. Carver is driven by pure revenge, Gideon by pure survival. Who will win in the end?

Review: A morality play with two Irishmen as Civil War soldiers? As improbable as that may seen, this film opens quickly with a pursuit through the snowy mountains of the Sierra Nevada mountains and continues across to the desert. Liam Neeson portrays Carver, a former Confederate officer who had returned to his wife and family and put away his uniform, only to be discovered by the Union, who sent Gideon (played by Pierce Bronson) to arrest him. After a series of unfortunate mistakes, Carver's wife and family are burned alive in their home while Gideon watches helplessly. Bronson's performance is a man running from an unspeakable horror and his part in it, Neeson's performance is the man who has allowed revenge to consume him. The remainder of the cast is solid in their performances. Angelica Huston and Wes Studi have interesting roles as surreal traders along the way in the desert, and you have to ask yourself if they are really there, or simply the facilitators of this climax between our two subjects. Tom Noonan gives an exceptional performance as the minister who is leading a flock to better fields. Rated R for violence and language, this is a film that will intrigue the intellectual and die hard oater fans alike. Collectible if you are a western or civil war fan, or just like watching Pierce and Liam hide their accents.

Catch .44 - 2011

Annapurna Productions, Emmett/Furla Films, Benaroya Pictures

Written and Directed by Aaron Harvey

Cast:

• Tes – Malin Akerman
• Sara – Reila Aphrodite
• Dawn – Deborah Ann Woll
• Sheriff Conners – Brad Dourif
• Ronny – Forest Whitaker
• Billy – Shea Whigham
• Mel – Bruce Willis

Story: In a crappy little, backwater diner in Texas, three young gals are about to rip off both drugs and money from two couriers when all hell breaks loose. Two of the girls are killed, along with a waitress, a driver, and a couple of tourists, leaving Tes and Billy, the cook, in a Mexican Standoff. But how did it all start? In the vein of Pulp Fiction and other film noir hits, we get flashbacks in bits and pieces to tell us how Tes got taken in to Mel's organization. Mel is the head man, the man running heroin and other drugs up and down from Mexico. He recruits Tes from one of his strip club / dives to work for him. But after three years the bloom is off the rose, so Tes and her friends are set up in the diner. How does it work out? You gotta watch the film.

Review: Film Noir is a lasting art form that rarely comes across for the general audience, and this film is no exception. Catch .44 is a gritty, no frills film with some excellent acting by both the principles and the cameo players. Bruce Willis and Brad Dourif are the supporting actors in this little drama, with Forest Whitaker taking the lead as Willis' second in command. Malin Akerman, Reila Aphrodite, and Deborah Ann Woll are excellent as the three clueless women who are thrust into a situation they were never meant to control. Most of the rest of the cast is window dressing, and the plot boils down to who lives through this dark drama. If you like Pulp Fiction or the old 40's style detective story, you'll probably enjoy this hour and a half of raw action. Rated R for violence, language and nudity, put this one back on the video store shelf after you've watched it.

Rustler's Rhapsody - 1985

Paramount Pictures, Impala, Tesauro S.A.

Written and Directed by Hugh Wilson

Cast:

• Rex O'Herlihan – Tom Berenger
• Peter – G. W. Bailey
• Miss Tracy – Marilu Henner
• Colonel Ticonderoga – Andy Griffith
• Railroad Colonel – Fernando Rey
• Colonel's Daughter – Sela Ward
• Bob Barber – Patrick Wayne

Story: A tribute to the serial westerns of the silver screen. Sort of. Rex O'Herlihan is the Singing Cowboy who rides into town to save the day from the evil cattle baron and his henchmen. He's not psychic, but he seems to know exactly what will happen in every town he rides into. Peter, the town drunk, is enthralled by Rex's smooth manners and fast draw, not to mention his exceptional wardrobe. He soon signs on with Rex as his sidekick, and together they fight for the rights of the townspeople and the sheepherders against Colonel Ticonderoga and the Railroad Colonel. All the thrills and suspense of the Saturday morning matinees of the late 1930's and 1940's, without the bloodshed or death.

Review: I was born in 1952, so I must have been about 10 years old when my brother and I were dropped off at the local theater in Waukegan along with a couple of hundred other kids to watch the Saturday morning matinees. In our days it was Flash Gordon, Sky King, and Commander Cody, all legendary “cliff hangers”, which meant they would always end the episode with the hero in danger and you would have to come back next week to see what happened. In the 1930's and '40's, the theme was the American West, and the heroes all rode stallions of white or gold, had two guns, sang and played guitar, and wore white hats. Tom Mix was the silent movie hero, then came Gene Autry, Randolf Scott, and later Roy Rogers. This well written parody takes all those memories and rolls them up in a pleasingly benign story that incorporates the old and the new. Language and sexuality are not an issue, so the kids can watch without worry. While there is a lot of innuendo, nothing is explicit enough to warrant anything more than a PG rating, and I think that is a little excessive. Not necessarily a collectible, but worth a viewing on a Saturday morning with the kids, just before they head out to play.